


Assemble! Yu-Tagonists

by driftingstar



Series: Secret Agents AU [1]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh!, Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D's, Yu-Gi-Oh! ARC-V, Yu-Gi-Oh! GX, Yu-Gi-Oh! VRAINS, Yu-Gi-Oh! Zexal
Genre: Alternate Universe - Spies & Secret Agents, Drabble Collection, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-07
Updated: 2017-08-02
Packaged: 2018-01-07 19:31:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 7,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1123546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/driftingstar/pseuds/driftingstar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summary:  In which Atem has some doubts about the current team assignments.  Secret agent AU.  Drabble Collection.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Assemble! Yu-Tagonists

 

“Well…” Atem broke off to duck under a volley of gunfire, tucking his limbs to his chest and rolling quickly to the other side of the corridor to join his partner.  Leaning with his back against the wall, revolver clutched between gloved hands, he chanced a look at the other man who was still frantically typing on his laptop.  “This operation is a bust.”

Barely looking up from the multitude of symbols flashing across the screen, Yusei said apologetically, “I must have tripped one of their fail safes when I was getting in. I shouldn’t have underestimated their security.”

Static crackled over the comms and a voice that sounded far too cheerful and encouraging for someone who was being shot at said, “I’m sure it wasn’t your fault, Yusei-kun.  There hasn’t been a system you couldn’t break into yet!”  In the background, someone let out what sounded like an extremely energetic battle cry that Atem could barely make out as something to do with bingo and cats.

“How are things over on your end, Aibou?” Atem pressed, brow knitting on concentration as he tried to angle himself to get a better look at their assailants. “And… was that the new recruit?”

“No, Yuya’s the newest,” Another voice came through enthusiastically amid the cacophony of shouting and expensive things breaking. “And let me tell you, that kid sure has style!  You should have seen the crazy flying stunt he just pulled!”

“Focus, Judai,” Yusei admonished, finally looking up from his laptop as he and Atem shared a resigned look, “This was supposed to be stealth op, remember?”

“Sorry, guys!” Yugi’s voice came back through their headsets, “I’ve got to turn this thing off; we’ve run into a bit of … Yuma! Oh gods, Astral, don’t encourage him—-!”

As the transmission cut off, violet eyes met blue as Atem and Yusei let out identical sighs. 

“On second thought,” said Atem, “Maybe our discovery had nothing to do with network security.”

“You might be right,” said Yusei.


	2. Computer Geeks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Division Leader Kaiba is not happy. More secret agent AU.

His long white coat swishing irritably behind him, Seto Kaiba stalked into the main monitoring room of the Intelligence division. Steely blue eyes swept across the room, scanning the agents sitting at the holographic displays with a displeased expression on his face.

 

“Where is Stardust?” he demanded of the baffled agents, who only blinked owlishly at him. 

 

“Sir,” one of the computer geeks spoke up hesitantly, “Have you checked the Engineering department?”

 

Kaiba levelled a withering stare at the speaker who immediately shrunk back.  “Yes,” he sneered.  “Of course I checked the Engineering department.  And the labs.  And the fucking nursery.  Where. Is. He?”

 

“What is it that you need him for?” A black-haired mousy-looking girl spoke up surprisingly boldly, pushing up her thick, coke-bottle glasses. 

 

Kaiba opened his mouth to insult her, but something about her appearance stayed his tongue.  He couldn’t quite figure out what it was, though.  “I need a man to hack into something on a Priority One field mission. It’s a two-man job and Stardust is the only one of you geeks that I can stand for more than five minutes since he actually knows how to keep his mouth shut.”

 

“Well…” said the girl, tapping her chin pensively. “How about Bruno?  He usually works as Yusei’s partner.  You probably won’t find many more available agents with that particular skillset.” 

 

At her words, a blue-haired man started and swivelled around on his chair, jaw dropping and pointing at his face. “M-Me?” he asked, “On a field mission?!”

 

Kaiba’s eyes raked across the spineless looking man and his workstation, noting his dishevelled appearance and the number of discarded ramen cups lying haphazardly around.  He frowned deeply as if having swallowed a lemon.  “Fine,” he spat, turning on his heels, not bothering to watch as the man scrambled to follow.  “Hurry up!”


	3. Honey Trap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Team ARC-5Dxal discuss mission parameters.

“What? No!” said Judai, brown eyes wide, bringing his hands up defensively as if warding off an attack.  “That would never work!”

 

“But Judai-kun,” Yugi-san cajoled, with those deceptively innocent eyes, “You’re the closest match to the profile _and_ you have a background in infiltration.”

 

Judai backed away, shaking his head.  “Not this kind of infiltration!” he denied.  He paused and levelled an accusing finger at the others lounging on the stuffed chairs behind him who were all suddenly wearing suspiciously straight faces. “Don’t pretend you weren’t smirking!”

 

“But Judai-senpai,” said Yuya cheerfully, pillowing his tomato-shaped head on his arms, the little shit. “I think you’ll look great.”  Yuma, who had been nodding off against the other boy’s back during the briefing started to cough in a vain attempt to disguise his snickers.

 

Judai scowled at them before searching the room, immediately dismissing a smirking Atem and a slightly confused looking Astral as possible allies.  Finally, he turned pleading eyes at their resident tech specialist. “C’mon, Yusei.  Back me up here!”

 

Yusei gave him a sympathetic, if not slightly pained expression.  “It’s not that bad, to be honest,” he said apologetically.  “Just remember to sit with your knees together.”  Judai stared at him open-mouthed as he tried to come up with an appropriate response.

 

“Great, then it’s decided!” said Yugi-san, who was also clearly Satan, clapping his hands together.  “Let’s all go help Judai-kun pick out a dress!”


	4. Morning People

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Team Yu-Tagonists gear up for action. Kind of.

"Ah," Astral said, staring bemusedly at the incredibly rare sight. "Good morning, Judai."

 

Judai mumbled something into the small table in their kitchenette which sounded a lot like either 'gurhermornghhh' or 'gohfckkoffff'.

 

"I... see?" replied Astral. He was saved from further awkward conversation when Yugi and Atem staggered into the doorway fully suited up but looking bleary-eyed and spotting rather frightening bedheads.

 

Yugi chuckled and gave Astral a tired looking smile as Atem mumbled a greeting and made a beeline towards the coffee-maker. "Good morning, Astral-kun. We normally don't talk to Judai-kun until after he's caffeinated," he advised kindly. Astral nodded, mentally cataloging the fact away as Yugi poured himself a bowl of cereal and began crunching away mechanically.

 

At the sound of the coffee machine whirling into action, Judai seemed to perk up. With his head still pillowed on an arm, he reached out with the other in a strange, grasping motion. "C'fee," he said.

 

As the coffee brewed, Yuma dashed in, barefoot and in his pajamas with a toothbrush hanging from his mouth. "Astral!" he said accusingly, "You were supposed to wake me up!!"

 

Astral sighed. "Yuma," he said with a patience that was somewhat legendary, "I did. You were awake when I left our rooms."

 

Yuma paused in his tirade and blinked. "You did?"

 

"If it makes you feel any better," chirped Yuya who had arrived just in time to catch the tail-end of their conversation, "Yuma-senpai _almost_ made it out of bed before falling asleep again. I just helped him along a bit." Apart from Astral and maybe Yugi, he was the only other one who looked remotely ready to be awake.

 

Yuma shot him an unimpressive glare as he slumped into a chair. "You didn't have to tip me out," he grumbled. Yuya only gave a beatific smile and plopped down beside him.

 

With a clink, a mug of steaming hot coffee was set in front of Judai who pounced on it and began guzzling, somehow managing not to sear his mouth. Atem smiled fondly and circled around with his own mug to sit next Yugi.

 

Bowls and a box of cereal were passed around the table until Yuma asked, "Is there any milk left?"

 

A thoughtful silence met his query as the majority of the table tried to work up the brain power needed to answer.

 

"Speaking of which," said Atem thoughtfully, "Has anyone seen Yusei at all this morning? We're to be at the hangar in twenty minutes."

 

"His sheets were folded this morning," Judai volunteered, setting down his mug and finally looking like a human being.

 

"Which could either mean he's up and about or he never went to bed last night," Yugi finished for him with a sigh.

 

After sharing resigned looks, the six of them reluctantly climbed to their feet and trotted towards the door. Luckily, in their small bunker, there wasn't a lot of ground to cover. They eventually found Yusei passed out in the lounge in front of his laptop which upon a closer look was displaying a fifty-page word document which was neatly titled 'Mission Report'. They then exchanged glances with varying degrees of guilt.

 

"We should let him sleep for a little longer," Atem said quietly as the other boys nodded in unanimous agreement. Yugi, Judai grinned sheepishly at each other as Yuma, Astral draped a duvet over the sleeping boy’s shoulders and Yuya slid a throw cushion beneath his head.

 

As the boys tiptoed out of the room, Astral concluded that he could get used to mornings like this.


	5. Cover Story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary: In which Judai and Yugi attempt to bluff their way out of a situation. Aftermath of “Assemble! Yu-Tagonists.”

They were stopped by border security on the way back of all things.

 

The burly officer squinted through the rolled down window of the convertible, trying to peer into the unlit interior. “Are you even old enough to drive?” he demanded.

 

Yugi fidgeted in the driver’s seat. “I’m 18,” he mumbled unhappily.

 

"Right," the officer drawled. "And I don’t suppose you can show me some ID?" Yugi and Judai, who was riding shotgun briefly exchanged looks of panic.

 

"Of course," said Yugi, fishing into the glove compartment and handed over a wallet.

 

"So, Mr. Suzie Williams was it?" The officer read out loud sounding less and less amused. Yugi flushed to the roots of his hair as he heard a muffled giggle from the back and privately promised to have a talk about how it is not proper decorum to laugh at a commanding officer.

 

"Oh, sorry," said Yugi even as Judai frantically started to search his pockets. "That must be my girlfriend’s."

 

"Of course it is," said the officer. "And just what are you kids doing way out here? You do realize you are about to cross a restricted border?"

 

"What?" said Judai loudly, pointing an accusing finger at Yugi. "I thought you said you didn’t need instructions, Eugene!"

 

"I said I didn’t need your instructions, Jason!” Yugi shot back, wildly gesturing with his hands. “If you were driving, we’d end up on Mars!”

 

Looking fed up with their banter, the officer said, “Alright, enough!” Yugi and Judai quieted and shot exasperated looks at each other.  ’Eugene?’ Yugi mouthed, horrified. Judai shrugged sheepishly.

 

"So, tell me again what you two were doing to end up out here at three in the morning?" The man interrupted their silent conversation, pulling out a recorder.

 

"We were just going to do touristy-things," said Judai just as Yugi answered, "We were going camping."

 

After a beat, Yugi amended, “We haven’t decided yet.”

 

"Sounds nice," said the guard. “And can you tell me the number on your license plate by any chance?"

 

"Uh," said Yugi and Judai.

 

"Interesting," said the guard, "It’s curious you don’t know it; your license plate number also happens to belong to a particular 73 year old Ms. Williams who reported her car missing just about 12 hours ago."

 

"Shit," said Judai as Yugi buried his reddening face in his hands as someone kicked the back of his seat.

 

"Now, I want you two to get out of the stolen vehicle. And whoever’s sitting in the back too," the officer ordered, a hand not so subtly lingering on his holster. "The joyride is over, kids."

 

Yugi and Judai sighed and unbuckled their seat belts. ‘Now what?’ Yugi mouthed. For a moment, Judai hummed thoughtfully before his eyes lit up somewhat maniacally.

 

‘Leave it to me,’ Judai mouthed back and Yugi suddenly wished he hadn’t asked. Yugi and Judai shuffled out of the car.

 

“I’m sure this is all a big misunderstanding, Officer!” Yugi said, clasping his hands together and drawing attention away from the fact that Judai was slowly edging away.

 

The burly man rolled his eyes. “I’ve heard that one before, kid,” he said, reaching for his belt.  “Now hold your hands up where I can see ‘em; mommy and daddy can pick you up at the precinct—-” Before the officer had a chance to finish his sentence, he slumped to the ground twitching revealing a grinning Judai.

 

Yugi let out a groan.  “I can’t believe we stole a car from an elderly woman,” he said.  “What are we going to say to Atem and Yusei-kun?”

 

“Forget about the car,” said Yuma, springing out from the back seat and pulling at his hair.  “We just tazed a cop! That’s definitely illegal!”

 

“At least 85.9% of everything we do is illegal, Yuma,” Astral reminded him calmly, climbing over a cackling Yuya to poke his head out from the door.  “But we wouldn’t have needed to do any of this if our original vehicle could have been salvaged.”

 

“Well, it’s not like I wrecked our getaway car on purpose,” Judai said with just a hint of petulance. “Having grenades thrown at you can do a number on your ride.”

 

"Next time," said Yugi vehemently, "We are not going _anywhere_ without a proper cover story!”

 


	6. Origin Story - Stardust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rex Godwin persuades a new recruit. Darker themes. Secret agents AU.

 

 

The door slid open with barely a sound, illuminating the dark, windowless cell.  The prisoner opened a baleful, blue eye to glare at his visitor from behind a curtain of long black hair but made no other movement beyond that.

 

“Well,” said the man standing in the light with his arms spread wide in a welcoming gesture, his appearance almost obsessively fastidious as usual.  “Have you given my offer any more thought?”  Only silence met his query and the prisoner closed his eyes once again, turning to face the other wall with clear intentions of tuning him out completely. The man let out a sigh and shook his head, long white hair swaying against the fabric of his grey suit.  “I strongly recommend you take it,” he said conversationally, flicking invisible specks of dirt from his pristine white gloves. “Or I’m afraid you will have to be… neutralized.  You’re a very dangerous man if you put your mind to it, Mr. Fudo.”

 

The prisoner finally spoke up, voice harsh from disuse.  “I won’t betray my comrades.”

 

The man chuckled, clasping his hands together.  “Yes, that is something you and I know all too well.  But I was thinking more along the lines of something like… parole.  How would you like to see your friends again?”

 

Grey eyes watched in satisfaction as the black-haired boy’s shoulders stiffened.  “What do you mean, Godwin?” he demanded, turning to face him, inadvertently revealing the criminal mark emblazoned on his cheek.

 

“The Agency could use your talents,” Godwin said with a cold smile that did not reach his eyes, “It would be a pity to let them waste away in here. And besides… if you’re locked away in here, who will keep them safe?”

 

The boy went silent as he processed the warning. “Threatening a criminal?” he asked softly, “The Agency is sinking to a new low.”

 

“Oh, I never use threats, Mr. Fudo,” the man said as he stepped back from the doorway.  “That was just a bit of well-intentioned advice. I trust I have your cooperation?”

 

Pushing himself to his feet with only a hint of unsteadiness, the prisoner brushed past him towards the waiting guards, staring determinedly ahead with his cuffed-wrists held in front of him.  

 

“Yusei-kun, was it?” Godwin mused aloud, watching as the boy was led away. “‘The wandering star’. But when a star dies, it leaves behind only dust.  I look forward to seeing what will be reborn from its ashes.”


	7. An Unholy Alliance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which two people, who should have never met, terrorize the night. More secret agents!AU.

The man paused mid-sentence and inclined his head, listening intently. Then he belted out a high, cackling laugh, his violet eyes glittering in cruel delight. “Sounds like we have ourselves a fly on the wall tonight.”

"So we do," his companion replied, sharing in his amusement. Peeking out from beneath his dark, embroidered hood was the beginnings of a wide, slasher’s smile. "Either this little insect is really confident in his skills, or he has no idea who we are."

"He’s a fool either way." The first man leaned back against the stack of crates and spread his arms back lavishly as if he was languishing on a throne. "Too bad it’s your turn to play tonight," he conceded with a sigh.

"How generous of you," the second man said with what could only be described as a purr and long white fingers reached deftly towards his holster.  The intruder bit back a whimper as a pair of yellow eyes turned unerringly in his direction.  Almost faster than the spy could react, his hiding place was shredded by  hail of bullets and he found himself quivering on his knees in front of two grinning, silver-haired men (monsters).

" _So_ ," said the first man, peering down at the little green-haired, bug-eyed intruder. ‘Insect’ was much more fitting a term than they had first realized. "Who are you to be seeking an audience with the King of Thieves and the God of Death?"


	8. It's Show Time!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the team try their hand at another stealth mission with varying success.

From his vantage point, the city looked like nothing more than a sea of glittering lights, twinkling up to reflect the stars. A sudden gust of the frigid evening air made him misjudge his step but he compensated for the loss of equilibrium by tucking himself into a roll and used the momentum to somersault onto the next ledge and break into a run.   Heaving a mental sigh, the boy lamented the fact that his heavily armed pursuers were making it rather difficult to enjoy the view.

 

"Get back here!" One of them roared, brandishing a pistol. "No one steals from the  Familga!"

 

"Well, what do you call this?" He taunted back, unable to resist the urge wave around his prize.  Then he winced as static erupted in his ear.

 

" _Is everything alright, Yuma-kun_?" Yugi's much-welcomed voice inquired from his ridiculously outdated communicator.  

 

"I've got the boss guy and five..." The boy paused to duck a couple of bullets. "Scratch that, make it six of his other guys on my tail," he announced rather gleefully.  He did not seem to be overly bothered about being caught red-handed. "But besides that, why the heck are we still using radio?! I've seen Yusei rig up better tech than this with just a toaster!"

 

" _Yusei's still on that month-long mission with Kaiba_ ," Atem's deep voice reminded him with a slight hint of displeasure, most likely because that left him stuck in the van helping Yugi monitor the mission instead of being outside getting shot at. " _We'll have to make do_." Here he pitched his voice loud enough to carry. " _Because a certain somebody blew up the equipment. And then dropped the reserve equipment in a lake_."

 

" _I said I was sorry_! _How was I supposed to know the thing had an eject button?_ " came a tinier sounding and slightly more petulant reply from across another line. " _I never did get my flying license.._."

 

" _Stop picking on Judai-kun and let him focus on his job_ ," Yugi scolded. "... _Which just so happens to include blowing stuff up most of the time_."

 

" _Not helping, Yugi-san_!"

 

" _Yuma, you're in position now. Try not to 'spaz out' like you normally do_ ,"  Astral interjected in such a deadpan way that no one could tell if he was joking.

 

"Shut up, Astral," Yuma replied absently.  He came to an abrupt stop at the edge of the roof and spun around to face his pursuers who were momentarily stunned into inaction. Yuma flashed them a wide, shit-eating grin as he kicked off his heels and toppled backwards off the fifty-storied building. The thugs stared at the vacated space in slack jawed confusion which quickly turned to alarm when the boy reemerged from the darkness, perched triumphantly on the nose of the miniature helicopter.

 

Next to him stood another boy whose eyes sparkled devilishly from behind a curtain of red and green bangs. Clutched in his hand was what looked suspiciously like a detonator.  "May I do the honors, Yuma-sempai?" The redhead yelled over the whirring of the propellers.

 

"Go for it, newbie!" Yuma shouted back. The two boys grinned at each other like the twin terrors that they were slowly getting to be.

 

Yuya twirled the remote merrily as he slid his goggles over his eyes.  "It's showtime!"

 

...

 

Yugi let out a breath of air and leaned back against his seat, stretching out his stiff joints.  "I guess that could have gone worse," he remarked as he watched the entire building go up in flames from behind the relative safety of his monitor.  “I thought the plan was just to escape with a smokescreen, Judai-kun.”

 

“ _...uh.._.”

 

Atem groaned and massaged his temples.  “Why do we still bother with subterfuge?”

 

 


	9. Downtime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there are actually consequences for leveling buildings in the line of duty.

Glancing around the hangar and at the stares with varying degrees of mutiny and wakefulness, she sighed and tapped her pen against her clipboard impatiently.  

 

"Like it or not," she said, stern, but not unkindly, as she tucked a strand of her long blonde hair behind her ear. "This is a standard debriefing, especially after a mission like the one you just had."

 

"Our mission went fine," Yuma mumbled almost intelligibly into Astral's shoulder as he fought to stay awake.  "Can we go home now?"

 

His pale-haired partner bore the burden of being used as a living pillow with stoic dignity and added, "As Yuma said, we accomplished all of our objectives. I do not understand the purpose of this meeting."

 

"Can we at least do this at not 3:00 AM in the morning?" Yugi asked plaintively, trying to rub the sleep from his eyes,  taking care not to disturb the Atem lightly dozing against his shoulder. Sitting next to him on the bench and similarly draped over an equally tired attentive-looking Yusei, Judai snored his agreement.

 

The girl's eyebrow twitched subtly but that was the only indication she was anything but impeccably composed and professional. "Somehow your team managed to follow the mission parameters to the letter... while ignoring every word of it. In terms of absolute dollar values, accounts of collateral damage to property has tripled since this team was assembled.  In the span of the last three nights alone, the real estate you destroyed was easily the equivalent of triple your combined annual salaries."

 

The boys' eyes, which had been bleary and half-lidded from exhaustion instantly sharpened as the implications sunk in. The team, sans Yuma, straightened up and gave the female agent their undivided attention.

 

"They're not thinking of disbanding the team, are they, Asuka?" Judai demanded, voicing the others' uneasy thoughts.

 

Asuka sighed somewhat sardonically. "As much as it would save the public relations department a lot of trouble and quite a bit hush money, your team still has one of the highest success rates across the Agency." The unspoken ' _despite your best efforts to completely level the city_ ', was clearly audible.

 

"So what has the Agency decided to do about it?" Atem asked, frowning. He absently giving Yugi's shoulder a reassuring pat when he felt him tense up beside him.

 

"Are they going to make us pay back the damages?" Yugi asked in a small voice. "We don't have the budget for that."

 

"... Now I kind of regret not going easy on the TNT last night," said Judai glumly, sinking into his seat.

 

"Please tell me if they're going to ground us, it'll be for at least a week," Yuma mumbled. In contrast to his teammates' alertness, he merely slid forward a couple of inches until his he was resting his head in Astral's lap and his toes were digging into Yusei's side.

 

"Standard protocol would put us on lock-down along with a cessation of other privileges," said Yusei, eyes narrowing in thought.  "But if that were the case, they would have done it a long time ago.  This is hardly the first time this has happened."

 

Asuka pursed her lips. "Normally Yusei would be correct," she said. "But in this case, the higher ups have decided that your unconventional methods and unwillingness to follow orders within the specified parameters is most likely due to fundamental personality defects, possibly arising from being exposed to trauma at too young an age. Therefore, you will be attending a series of interviews with some of the Agency's top mental health professionals, effective immediately."

 

A strained pause met her declaration. "So in plain language," Atem said slowly, mostly for the sake of Yuma and Judai's slightly glazed eyes, "The higher ups think we're a bunch of messed up teenagers and the only solution is _group therapy_?"  At that, the boys bristled with indignation as they started to protest.

 

A hint of exasperation slipped through Asuka's blank mask hinted that she too shared their opinions. She held up a hand for quiet and continued on. "I ask you all for your full cooperation to make this exercise as painless as possible." Then she happened to glance over to the end of the bench where a suspiciously quiet Yuya sat with his tinted-goggles pulled over his eyes. "That includes you too, Agent Pendulum!"

 

Yuya jolted awake with a yelp, accidentally knocking into Astral and Yuma which in turn sent the bench and its occupants tumbling to the ground.

 

Asuka stood over the groaning pile of the Agency's finest and resisted the urge to hit something with her clipboard.  Or shoot something full of holes.

 

 


	10. Ceiling Conversation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Yuya, Yuto, and Yugo hang around in the ceiling and debate important matters. Characters: Yugo, Yuya, Yuto and Yusei.

He leaned forward, careful to keep his weight evenly distributed to avoid setting off any noises as he navigated the cramped space, icy blue eyes fixed determinedly on his quarry through the thin gaps in the grate. 

“What are you doing?” A serious voice suddenly spoke up from behind him and he nearly plummeted through the ceiling in shock. Snapping his head backwards, he hissed in displeasure upon catching a glimpse of a frowning version of his own face behind him. 

“Me?!” he retorted, “When did you even get up here?! And, oh my _god_ , do you seriously have to follow me everywhere, Yuto?”

Yuto’s dark eyes narrowed. “You should leave him alone. This obsession of yours is getting out of hand.”

"I'm not obsessed!" He denied vehemently.

"What are you doing up here in the ceiling, then?" A new voice interjected, startling them both for a moment. There was a soft scraping sound as one of the grates beside them detached themselves and a tomato colored head popped into the narrow crawlspace. It was starting to get a little bit cramped up there.

"Yuya?!" The blue haired boy shrieked, but in a tense whisper, lest he alerted the entire building of his probably less than wholesome deeds. "Are you following me too?!"

"Nope, I've been here all day," Yuya admitted. Hiding from Sora and Yuri, he didn't add. "So what are you doing, Yugo?"

"He's spying," Yuto said distastefully, "On another agent."

"Shut up," Yugo insisted. "I'm not spying."

"Stalking, then?" Yuto suggested, raising a wry eyebrow.

"Shhhhhh," Yugo said suddenly and forced down their heads. "He's here!"

Down below, there was a small beep and the mechanical doors to the workshop slid open. A dark haired man with golden streaks through his hair wandered in nothing but a pair of loose pants and a towel draped around his shoulders. His faintly damp hair that was curling around his neck suggested a recent shower. The man made a beeline for his laptop and flipped it open, not bothering to pull on a shirt.

"You have a crush on Yusei?" Yuya whispered gleefully.

"Oh god, will you shut up!" Yugo hissed back, ears reddening. "It's not a crush, damnit!"

"He's been stalking him for days," Yuto sighed in a long suffering kind of way. "I've been telling him to just go talk to him."

"Shut up, it's not a crush and I am not stalking anyone!" Yugo let out a string of furious denials. "I... I just admire him as a senior agent!!"

Yuya was shaking from the effort of holding in his laughter. "Yuto, why didn't you mention this before?!"

"'Cuz I said I'd punt his punk ass into a different dimension!" Yugo growled.

Silence filled the vent for a moment when they realized Yugo had neglected to moderate his voice that time. The three peered down again only to freeze when they saw that the subject of their discussion had stopped working and was now watching the vent in inscrutable blue eyes. The three of them eep'ed and ducked out of the way but it was already too late.

"Yuya, could you and your brothers to speak a little quieter?" Yusei requested, smiling apologetically. "The sound kind of carries... And, Yugo, right? You're more than welcome to visit in person if you need anything."

Yugo thought he would die of embarrassment.


	11. Honey Trap 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which team Yutagonists prepare for a mission.

Sometimes having both Yugi and Atem as commanding officers could be such a pain in the ass.

 

Not that there was anything remotely objectionable about the duo. No, Yugi was always kind and willing to lend an ear with the stress got a bit too much and Atem was always full of patient wisdom. It was just that, sometimes, their missions were overly convoluted and very poorly planned out.

 

"Aw, crap," Judai hissed as he tripped over the canary yellow hem of his bridesmaid dress. "How in the twelve dimensions is this a good idea? I mean, I get that we’re infiltrating a wedding party, but seriously!"

 

"Hold still, Judai," Yusei admonished as he tried to put the finishing touches on Judai's long brown wig but the agent kept moving around. Yusei bore his own gown with a quiet sort of dignity.

 

His dress was in cerulean blue and had heavily modified sleeves to hide the muscles in his arms. His hair had somehow been tamed enough to lay flat on his head and a small fortune in foundation and powder had been spent on covering his criminal tattoos.  "You just need to take smaller steps. Like Yuya over there."

 

Both pairs of eyes swiveled over to where Yuya glided across the floor in graceful strides like a prima ballerina and then did a little twirl which made his poofy dress fan out like a sunflower.

 

"Tada!" Yuya announced as he sketched a little bow to a mostly invisible audience. Astral clapped politely, looking perfectly blank and maybe a bit too at ease in his overly frilly skirts.  He was the only one who did, but Yuya beamed at him anyway.

 

His brother Yuto, on the other hand, wasn't nearly as enthusiastic. The dark-haired boy sat on a bench with his back ramrod straight and his hands neatly folded in his lap as if he were reluctant to even breathe wrong else he ended up like Yugo who had been taken off the mission when he broke an ankle, trying to walk in stilettos.

 

"Yuya, please," Yuto said, rubbing the bridge of his nose. His hand reached up to fiddle with the ridiculous bow they had stuck in his hair to make him look a bit more... Feminine. It didn't work.

 

A hand smacked his away from his hair as a mock-affronted voice, "Don't ruin my hard work, Yuto." Yuto sighed loudly and proceeded to pretend he couldn't see the speaker's glittering magenta eyes.

 

"Yuri," he said with a long suffering sigh. "We are both well aware that it looks ridiculous."

 

"Oh, please," Yuri drawled with a dismissive wave, crossing his ankles delicately. He, on the other hand, looked resplendent in a fluttery pink number that went quite nicely with his highlights. "Like you are even remotely qualified to opine on what is fashionable or not, brother of mine."

 

Yuto only responded with a stony stare, far too used to the other's shenanigans.

 

But Yuri continued on, undeterred. "Your wardrobe is entirely too drab and you have such an unfortunate fondness for ties."

 

Yuto shrugged briefly like he couldn't be bothered to defend his clothing choices. "If you're looking for a fight, you're talking to the wrong twin," he remarked dryly.

 

"Oh, don't get me started on him," the fuchsia-haired brother groused, clenching his teeth like he had a personal grudge. "That motorcycle-obsessed idiot still matches his primaries!"

 

"Who are you calling an idiot?!" an indignant voice shouted across the room. They turned to see Yugo stalking angrily towards them, but the effect was somewhat marred by the giant cast on his leg and the fact that he was leaning heavily on a set of crutches.  

 

"Yugo," Yuto said with a frown. "You're supposed to be resting." Yugo opened his mouth to retort but ended up yelping when a wobbly Yuma with windmilling arms crashed into him, sending them both flying.

 

It was just poor timing that Atem and Yugi had just chosen to enter the room and Yugo’s crutches ended up nailing Atem right in the face.

 

Everyone froze in their respective positions as their esteemed leader slowly picked himself up.  

 

Judai tried.  He really did.  But he couldn’t help the giggle that bubbled up in his throat and made his shoulders shake at the sight of Atem with princess curls and an angry red mark on his forehead.  His laughter unfortunately set the rest of his team off and Yuma, Yuya, and Yugo and everyone else who lacked self-preservation instincts went into hysterics.

 

“Your… Your codename should be _goldilocks_ ,” Yuma laughed, beating his fists on Yugo’s chest and Yugo started tearing up from laughing too hard and also from the pain of Yuma lying on top of his cast.

 

Yuri hummed consideringly and said, “I don’t think lilac is quite your color.”

 

The rest of Atem’s face colored to match his bruise as he reached into the high slit cut in his dress to grab his pistol with a deliberate slowness.  

 

Yusei took his cue and stepped back, pulling Astral and Yuto along with him. They were good kids, he reasoned.  And it was too late for the others.

 

Behind him, Judai shrieked as Atem started to fire at his feet.

 

Yugi looked at the flailing chaos in the room and buried his face in his hands.  He should have known giving them full range with the disguises and leaving them to their own devices for a whole thirty minutes was a bad idea.

 

The replacement dresses and makeup ended up coming out of their next three pay cheques.

 


	12. New Arrivals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Yuusaku has some doubts about his new team assignments.

Yuusaku let out a sigh and closed his suitcase with a click.  The sound carried a tone of finality as it echoed across the barren room.  

 

“A transfer, huh?” he mused out loud to the plain white walls. It was with slight trepidation that he had accepted the offer.  This team was supposedly the Agency's elite task force and surely working with them will get him closer to his goal. 

 

But he has heard… things.  Like how his new coworkers were responsible for one third of their entire agency's collateral damage.  Or how every single one of their infiltration missions ended with explosions.  

 

He sighed again, feeling a slight migraine impending.  Hopefully, with such a… colourful assortment of characters, he could just fade into the background like he's used to.  Surely such an elite and destructive team of battle-hardened agents wouldn't have the slightest interest in someone like him? 

 

“ _ Hey newbie.” _

 

A sudden burst of static and an overly cheerful voice almost made him wince as he stared at the door in consternation.  For a moment, he debated not answering in an attempt to hold on to his increasingly fragile peace. 

 

“ _ You're in there, aren't you? Yuuma saw you on the security footage.”  _

 

Yuusaku sighed and wandered over to release the lock.  He immediately regretted his choice when the metallic door slid open to reveal five beaming little faces all clustered together like they were trying to be the first to catch a glimpse of him.  He had to do a double take when he noticed that four of them looked completely identical and it said a few things about how his brain worked when his first thought was “clones” instead of “quadruplets”.  

 

He hadn't expected children in the base.

 

“... can I help you?” he asked carefully and took a healthy step back when their eyes lit up with poorly hidden excitement.  

 

“So… so cool!” The shortest one, who thankfully didn't have the same face as the others, practically squealed with stars in his red eyes. “What's your name?  What's your favourite colour? How did you get so tall?” 

 

Yuusaku was understandably overwhelmed at the sudden barrage of questions but before he could gather himself to answer the rest of the boys swooped in to attack like little identical piranha.

 

“Why did you transfer?”  “Can we show you around?”  “What would you say is the most painful way to disable your opponent? Heehee...”  “Do you like motorcycles?”

 

Yuusaku held up a hand and the onslaught came to a halt.  He eyed the smirking purple one a little dubiously before he started to speak.  “Fujiki Yuusaku. No preference. Classified. Maybe later. Classified.” 

 

He paused to take a slight breath, and happened to glimpse the last child’s big, hopeful blue eyes.  “...yes.” 

 

The grins that broke across their faces could outshine the sun. 

  
  
  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I probably completely butchered his personality ;;;;


	13. Morning People Redux

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuusaku and his new team gear up for a mission. Sort of.

 

It took less time than he thought it would for the controlled chaos in the barracks to turn into the new normal.   Yuusaku woke up exactly at six in the morning to the sound of crashing.   He covered his mouth with his hand to yawn and rolled off his bed.  Something shattered in the distance, ceramic and expensive from the sounds of it since he could hear Yuugi shrieking and Yuugi was the only person who seemed to care about their budget.

 

He stepped into the shared bathroom to brush his teeth, noting that his elusive roommate's side remained untouched. Still out on a mission, it seemed.  Not that he minded having the extra space to himself. He brushed his teeth mechanically, ignoring the sudden banging on his door.

 

“Yuusaku, you awake?” It was Juudai.  He must have had at least two cups of coffee already because he wasn't slurring his sentences and sounded too chipper to be allowed.  “Uh, don't go down to the kitchen yet, ‘kay?  I think Yuuri convinced Yuugo to make a cake.  Yuugi-san and Yuuto are trying to clean things up now.”

 

Yuusaku would have responded but he could already hear his footsteps bouncing away, presumably off to warn someone else.  A few moments later, there was a flurry of voices and the unmistakable thud of either Yuuma or Yuuya falling out of bed.

 

After deciding that he might as well get out and get some exercise in, he pushed open the door to brave the outside.  There was no one in the hall to stop him so he walked briskly, hoping to get to the exercise room without running into anyone else.   He paused for a second outside Yuuma’s room to stare at the sight of Astral trying to pry a blanket out of the younger boy’s death grip.  (“Yuuma, it's time to get up.”  “But Astraaaal!!”)  Shaking his head slightly at the daily spectacle, he nearly made it out until one of the ceiling tiles suddenly moved aside and Yuuya dropped down in front of him without making a sound.  

 

“Yuusaku!” the redhead greeted cheerfully.  “Can you lend me a hand in the briefing room?”

 

“A mission?” he asked.  

 

“You could say that,” Yuuya said with a mischievous wink that never boded well for anyone.  The so-called mission turned out to be hanging a bunch of ugly orange and yellow streamers all over the pristine white walls.  Yuusaku bore it with dignity, though he was mostly holding onto things for Yuuya and helping him get hard to reach places.  Astral and Yuuma eventually turned up and started to unfurl some kind of banner. Yuusaku briefly considered asking one of them what was going on but was interrupted by more arrivals.

 

“I said I've got this, stupid-Yuuri,” Yuugo was saying loudly as he shoved his way into the room, with his arms laden something that Yuusaku guessed was the cake that Juudai had warned him about earlier, but it looked more like a chaotic abomination of frosting and too much enthusiasm.  An annoyed Yuuri, followed by a harassed-looking duo of Yuuto and Yuugi trailed after him.

 

“Oh no, they're almost here,” Yuugi was muttering nervously to himself, just as Yuuri stuck out a foot and sent Yuugo and the platter flying.  Yuusaku, being the closest, darted forward, grabbing Yuugo by the scruff of his neck with one hand and catching the tray with the other.  

 

“Thanks, Yuusaku!” Yuugo said with a vaguely worshipful gaze and Yuusaku coloured awkwardly when he heard clapping in the background.

 

“It's nothing,” he said quickly as he set both Yuugo and his cake down, although his voice was mostly drowned by the sound of three people all scolding Yuuri at the same time . But everything came to a pause when Juudai suddenly threw open the door.

 

“Look who's here!” the brunette yelled, and everyone straightened up with wide, beaming grins.

 

“Atem!”

 

“Yuusei!”

 

“Welcome home!”

 

Yuusaku hung back as the rest of the boys practically threw themselves at the two haggard and bewildered looking agents standing in the doorway. Yuusei and Atem hadn’t even changed out of their mission gear but that didn’t stop them from being hugged within an inch of their lives.  Even quiet, undemonstrative Yuuto was clinging onto Atem’s arm.  

 

The room was in a sorry state with streamers taped haphazardly on the walls, a lopsided ‘WELLCOME HOME’ banner and Yuugo’s masterpiece sitting sadly on the corner of the meeting table. But Yuusei and Atem were nearly moved to tears.  They all looked thrilled, even though Yuusei was wrapped in bandages and Atem was favouring his left leg.  With all these carefree smiles, no one could have suspected just what they all did for a living.  Despite himself, Yuusaku found himself smiling too.

  
  
In the end, the cake turned out to be surprisingly edible.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *whispers* I. Love. Yuusaku.
> 
> ...Which is why you're seeing this update today instead of in three years.


	14. Cliffhanger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Yuusaku hangs around with his fellow agents.

“Well,” says Judai cheerily.  “It could always be worse.”

 

Yuusaku peers over the edge of the swinging cage and lets out a sigh.  The sheer drop doesn’t look any less sheer and the large, protruding spikes that lined the bottom of the pit seem as sharp and lethal as ever.  

 

“How?” asks one quarter of the clone brigade. His tone is more curious than panicked as he yawns without covering his mouth.  Even Yuusaku has trouble telling them apart sometimes, especially that one time they all got themselves dyed pink.

 

“I know!” replies another clone, his eyes curving up into little arches as he beams. “We could all be trapped in a cage that's about to be dropped into a deathtrap with no chance of survival.  Oh wait.”

 

“Dial back the sarcasm, Yuuri,” the first clone sighs.

 

Magenta eyes glitter with glee. “Make me.” But when the first clone only sighs and looks back down at his shoes, he seems to deflate.  “Where's Yuugo when you actually want him.”

 

“No one make anyone do anything.  Please.” Yugi cuts in, although his voice comes out muffled since he's speaking into his knees.  “Everyone just calm down and stop panicking.”

 

All of them turn to him with slightly concerned looks.  Out of respect, they don't point out he's the only one who seems to be panicking.

 

“Yugi- _san_ , are you okay?” Judai asks, leaning closer and the cage shifts with his weight.  “Are your ulcers acting up again?”

 

“Yes,” Yugi says in a voice that is slightly pinched. “I mean.  The swaying is a little…”

 

“Ah,” they say.

 

“If Astral was here, he’d know what to do,” Yuuma laments, sitting cross-legged in the corner and leaning rather precariously against the bars.

 

The cage does feel rather full.  Yuusaku sighs for the third time as he deliberately blocks from his mind the three reasons that led to them being in this predicament since it doesn't really help.  

 

Yugi aside, the rest of them seem to be in relatively good spirits since: one, none of them were injured, two, all of them were relatively seasoned veterans, and three, rescue in the form of Atem, Yuusei, Astral, and the rest of the clones was probably on its way.

 

A loud, jarring rattle suddenly sounds from somewhere above them, followed by the ugly clank of grinding chains. They look up, a slight sinking feeling in the pits of their stomachs as they see what was being lowered down beside him.

 

“Um. Hey guys,” says Yuuya.  Behind him, Atem, Yuusei, Astral and Yuugo all sport identical guilty expressions. They wave.

  
“Well, shit,” says Judai.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are so many puns here that I can't even


End file.
